That pure Cane Spirit since 1848.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Other people’s holiday snaps

Fatmammycat over at El B’s, reminds me of an incident that I witnessed in Montenegro. It was the year before all hell broke loose, and a former Mrs Maroon and I were enjoying a cracking cheap holiday.

We were sitting as you do, drinking fantastic wine, watching The World.
We hadn’t spoken for a while, not because we had run out of things to say, that came later, but because our faces had gone numb, when in walked the English Family Abroad.

I’m not embellishing this. Ma and Pa, mid thirties smartly dressed, as identical twins, with the Boy and Girl 10,11? also identically dressed but to a different colour scheme. All four were wearing the same white sun-hats; adult versions of the ones babies wear.

As they arranged their impedimenta, Mrs M remarked, in the cruel funny way that women do: “Christ look Ack, it’s the Fit Family!” alluding to the TV advert for Ski yoghurt.

In truth, they were actually an attractive group and initially behaved like normal human beings: “This is a lovely spot. Mmm, those ice creams look good. Who’s got the camera?”

The waiter arrived and before he could ask, Pop stands up with the menu in his hand and declares like Anthony to the Senate:
“Eh two BEER-OES (gives waiter the vics) and two KOAH-KAH KOALAS (as in the bear, gives waiter the vics again), PERLEASE.” Sits down.
“POR FAVOR” says Mater confusingly.

he didn’t say “my good man“, but it was there, and his voice had changed into Peter Sellars doing his Scoutmaster routine.

The dam burst, I had foolishly looked over at Mrs Maroon who was staring at them with her glass halfway to her gaping mouth*.
“Oh fuck off, they have got to be at it”
She said, in the cruel way that women do.

* beautiful full ruby lips


Anonymous said...

Malaysia & Singapore & brunei ultimate internet blogshop
for wholesale & supply korean add-ons, earrings, earstuds, choker, rings, bangle, hair &
trinket accessories. Promotion 35 % wholesale price cut. Ship Worldwide
Also see my webpage > playstation repair

Anonymous said...

You actually make it appear so easy together with your
presentation but I to find this topic to be actually one thing that I think I'd never understand. It kind of feels too complicated and very huge for me. I am taking a look forward in your next put up, I will attempt to get the grasp of it!
Here is my weblog ... belly fat

Anonymous said...

Hi to all, how is everything, I think every one is getting more from this web site, and your views are good in favor of new users.

my page FDA approved diet and appetite suppressors in Miami

Anonymous said...

Greetings from Carolina! I'm bored to death at work so I decided to check out your site on my iphone during lunch break. I really like the info you provide here and can't wait to take a look when I get home.
I'm amazed at how quick your blog loaded on my cell phone .. I'm not even using
WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, very good site!

Review my weblog - fingerprint building in thailand
My website > Love Bite

Anonymous said...

Hi there, just wanted to say, I loved this post. It was helpful.
Keep on posting!

Here is my web blog ... voip

Anonymous said...

What a material of un-ambiguity and preserveness of valuable know-how concerning unpredicted emotions.

My web page:

Anonymous said...

Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iphone and tested to
see if it can survive a 40 foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation.
My apple ipad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
I know this is completely off topic but I had
to share it with someone!

Feel free to visit my web site ::

Anonymous said...

Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my apple ipad and tested to see if it can survive
a 25 foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation.
My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it with someone!

Feel free to surf to my blog:

buy zenegra 50 mg online said...

Zenegra 10 Tablet is a physician endorsed medication used to treat erectile dysfunction in men. It works by expanding the bloodstream to the penis. This causes men to get or keep an erection. It has a place with a gathering of prescriptions known as phosphodiesterase type 5 inhibitors.