On Sunday we like to cut sandwiches for our return from the Boston Arms at 3:30. We like old fashioned sandwiches best; smoked salmon, egg and cress, roast beef. We like to arrange them in three piles on paper doilies on the big oblong sandwich plate and cover them with a square of muslin.
We like to walk along the river in the afternoon to work up our appetites. When we come in, we get the wine from the fridge and the sandwiches from the pantry and settle to watch deal or no deal. We have a woollen travel rug that we spread over us even if it’s warm because it’s nice and special to do so. We usually bring a surprise home like a small box of chocs or Turkish delight. We like to have a snog during the wine and sandwiches. We like to laugh when someone who is poor ends up with nothing on deal or no deal. We like it when the other contestants start to cry because they look silly. We find it sexy and we like to start petting while Noel Edmunds commiserates with them. We like to have oral when the banker reduces his offer and the poor person tries to smile. Then we like to have more wine and a nap before Gordon Ramsay.
That pure Cane Spirit since 1848.
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20 comments:
I dread to think what Gordon Ramsey does to you. Does it involve lube?
Sx
It must be like a bucket of cold water when someone wins the jackpot. Worst of all would be Noel Edmonds having a snog.
This is what the Lord's Day is made for. God bless you Dr. M.!
I used to feel the same about the Antiques Roadshow, nice to hear you're normal after all Doc.
Surprise!
Pack of lies. He has not been at home on a Sunday for 18 months (RNAD defence equipment and support -not allowed to leave) and the Boston Arms where he used to take me was bought out and is now The Wallace and Vomit.
I have read this "blog" and Pat, Eryl, Savannah, Sarah, Kim Ayres and Conan seem very nice.
What - I wonder - do you have at the Boston Arms?
But what is normal?
OOOh Mre M - I shall go to bed happy.
Oh, Hello Mrs Maroon.
Sx
Scarlet I love Gordon Ramsay. He has balls of brass.
Ax
Mr Gorilla Bananas you’re right! I hate Edmonds except when he is hands on with an overweight female winner from Jamaica. His discomfort is very arousing.
Kevin you are too kind. God bless you. Do you notice how all the women are ‘fessing up? This is the forum for it. It’s as good as a college education. Stick with us.
Really Eryl? Fantastic. At what point did you have the oral? Was it when the expert pointed out the hairline crack that reduced the value by 98%? That’s what does it for us.
Christ. Hi dear. That’s a nice handbag. Would you care for an alcoholic beverage or something?
Pat oh you know, Bushmills and coke, couple o’ puffs of pollen if there’s any around, you know, the usual.
“OOOh Mre M - I shall go to bed happy” I bloody won’t.
Scarls please do not encourage her.
Oh.
RNAD eh? Renown, Resolution, Repulse, Revenge, I suppose, Maroon.
Hello Scarlet-Blue hello Mrs Pouncer. Dr Maroon has not spoken about either of you but you obviously know him well. Mrs Pouncer seems to know a lot about warships. Is she a Wren?
Errm....Scarlet. Any preferences on this one?
i like oral anytime. not just during deal or no deal.
Mrs Maroon - i assure you, i am not nice. :o)
Something like that Clarissa. I think even the order is correct. My life story in warships. boats.
Mum I wish you would let me play with my friends. Look Mater, Inspector Morse is on Channel 10!
Christ SafeT's mom coming round was alarming enough.
Sarah, I bet you are nice. I think you doth protest too much. I bet you're a regular Polyanna. And why the hell not?
I don't think Mrs P is a Wren. But she probably has a version of the uniform tucked away in her wardrobe somewhere.
Would you like her to be a Wren?
Sx
i have anger issues Maroon.
pollyfuckinanna.
but i heart you for thinking so highly of me.
I think Mrs Maroon is playing with us, Scarlet. Maybe she is also a loyal servant of the Crown, possibly at an HMNB somewhere? Vigilance, Vanguard, Vengeance, Victorious, Mrs Maroon?
OK, so this is a Christian allegory. You know, the lion is Christ, the older sister who likes sex is the devil, the sandwiches are the body of Christ. Easy peasy really.
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