That pure Cane Spirit since 1848.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Gail Trimble: Fox or Minger?




With total recall and lightning buzzer finger,
the classically trained Portia single-handedly dragged the dolts of Corpus in her wake.
How long before we see her in Nuts or FHM? Wouldn’t it be great?
What about a flash of her knickers as she disembarks a limo, out on the town with Lilly Allen?

Or a tasteful bikini series, rolling on some beach in Antigua with her boffin boyfriend?

I can see it now:
Gail’s Hunk Gets A Starter For Ten!

She will be on the cover of the Oxford prospectus for years.




Full-time team analysis.

Kay: 3/10 his wrong answers and gormless expression were a joy.

Swartzman: 7/10 contributed well in the final but definitely cross-eyed.

Trimble (cptn): 10/10 tactical maestro gave Manchester enough rope then crucified them.

Marsden: 4/10 foppish hair and total ignorance, a throwback ripe for ridicule.


233 comments:

1 – 200 of 233   Newer›   Newest»
scarlet-blue said...

She'd scrub up well, if she wanted too. But I doubt she can be bothered.
Sx

Dr Maroon said...

detersursum bene I believe is the Latin for it. Perhaps she'll tell us.
Ax

Mrs Pouncer said...

Edepol, fautor tuus maximus sum.
I am Gail Trimble.

Dr Maroon said...

I thought I had left out a ge as in, deterge sursum bene but I now see I made a total roaring chorus of it.
I am indebted to you, M'Lady.

savannah said...

maybe i just haven't had enough coffee yet, but i fail to see the humor in this, sugar. these are children, right?

PI said...

It must be catching: I've got 2 new ones and lost one but the dear knows who. Followers I mean.
You'll have to excuse me - the police are at the door - in plain clothes and pregnant.

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seperated by a common language savannah.
A very witty satire, if I may say so, on the British prediliction for celebrity and a debate currently raging in Britain today on the final of University Challenge, held last night and won by Corpus Christi College Oxford, a state polytechnic for underpriviliged kids with promise. Gail, our heroine, is reckoned the most clever woman ever, yet I know for a fact that this is not so. Chill Sav, the tabloids are already sifting through her garbage looking for needles and £2 wraps. It's just the times we live in.

Dr Maroon said...

Pat, what have you been doing? Driving into gateposts again?
I thought YTL had taken the keys off you for your own good.

savannah said...

thank you, sugar, for the explanation. i tend not to follow the tabloids heah for that very reason. but now, in retrospect, i do see your brilliant satire.
xo/szaw

problemchildbride said...

Christ, she's not related to David, is she?

Eryl Shields said...

Thankfully she seems to be neither. I really do think it's time to burn the tabloid offices to the ground, a la Fight Club.

ninetyninewords said...

Ah, but can she iron?

Dr Maroon said...

Sam, she looks more like Gerry Adams and don't call me Christ.

Eryl,did you watch the final? I bet you were rootin for Yeo and his Manchester has-beens. You've got bolshie tendencies, I can tell.


Ninetyninewords, of course she can iron. Robin starch the lot. A must for collars and cuffs.

Sarah said...

hmm.. a nerdy girls knickers.

i knew there was a reason i like you Maroon.

Jimmy Bastard said...

I'm sure she can still raise a duvet along with the rest of us.

...although in her case she could probably come up with the exact chemical compound of the gas itself.

inkspot said...

Good lord, I've just come from Can Bass' place, where he too has a post on the Trimble factor. You are even behind on the Nuts aspect; Mme Inkspot informs me that they've already tried negotiating with her brother, having confused him with her pimp, and he brushed them off in suitably fraternal terms.

PI said...

No I haven't driven for months but if you really want to know you'll drop by. I'll put the kettle on and some biscuits left over from the Christmas hamper.
Maybe a kir?

Dr Maroon said...

I'm off kir the now Pat, I may have a shortie and tea though. Is it the one the monkeys drink?

Inky you're kidding me. Do you think they got the idea here? Am I due money?

Mr Bastard, I believe there is the touch of the wampher about you.

Yes Sarah, you know the sort of thing; quick flash like whatshername, Britney! Although she'd forgotten her knickers altogether I think, or was it her son? I know she left something behind.

Eryl Shields said...

I've just watched it, and you're right I did root for Manchester which seems bonkers as I already knew the others won.

I liked Trimble, the way she encouraged her team mates with little smiles: she'll make a good mother.

Not bolshie at all, though I do have tendencies.

inkspot said...

OK, here's a Univ. Challenge-type easy-peasy lemon-squeezy rocket science question: why are exhaust nozzles flared?

This is all because the first time in school physics here that Newton's laws are mentioned is in the context of rocket motion. Insane, since the wretched kids don't encounter calculus for another two years at least.

Sorry Doc, you can have your blog back now.

Sarah said...

yes yes.. but the key here being nerdy girl.

i <3 the geek speak.

garfer said...

I wonder if she supplements her student loan by pole dancing.

Dr Maroon said...

Sarah, i less than 3. Does this have anything to do with the square root of 1 ?

Good old De Laval. Now let me think.
Ve = the root of {TR/M . 2k/k-1 . [ 1- (Pe/P)to power of (k-1/k)]}
Am I close Inky? It was all a long time ago.

Of course she does Garfer. Is that tunnocks teacakes by the way? The prince of biscuit style sweetmeats? I commend you. That goes for everyone. You haven't lived until your fillings have ached with these things. What will you have to drink Garfer? I have it. A vodka and Irn Bru. Get that down ye.

I am always right Eryl, the sooner you accept that, the easier it will be for you.

Sarah said...

now you've done it.

i must go "rub one out" in the ladies room now.

not very lady like.

Mrs Pouncer said...

Merciful heavens, Maroon! I sincerely hope this doesn't mean the same thing as it does in the Thames Valley. I wonder what Gail Trimble would say? Clara voce cogito, probably.

Dr Maroon said...

Or maybe,"cito...cito...aio...aio...o Dei...aio!"

Dr Maroon said...

Whatever rocks your boat Sarah pet.

What about " ...in which an angle subtentended from the virtual horizon to the last observed azimuth of the object..."

any use to you?

Dr Maroon said...

Clarissa venire cum me, societas huc non jocundus est.

Mrs Pouncer said...

Actum est, comites.

Next.

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thank you, sugar, for the explanation. i tend not to follow the tabloids heah for that very reason. but now, in retrospect, i do see your brilliant satire. xo/szaw

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