I’m not one to draw attention to myself but in recent days I’ve noticed two separate references to Achilles the Superb, the great warrior of old They’ve been rather disparaging references to be honest and I won’t dishonour the guilty parties here, but perhaps Mr Ayres and Mr Bananas aren’t quite as smart as they sometimes think. Surely by now they know how sensitive I am regarding the name Achilles.
There now. That’s that.
We’re all friends again and we’ll say no more about it.
All I’m saying is some of us carry the burden of an altogether more iconic, some would say ridiculous, nominative. Every day some of us have to see it on our credit cards, our passports (I can not return to Corfu) and drivers licences. Try talking to someone when they’re staring at your security tag, reading and re-reading your name, mouthing it silently. The so-called friends who write out your name in full for the amusement of the postman even though you’ve begged them not to.
I mean, I think we’d all agree that I’ve been pretty supportive when Kim bemoans his name; I keep telling him straight that it’s common.
My father says that Gorilla Bananas may be the best essayist since Orwell. Well, could be, but he’s never getting on the South Bank Show with a name redolent of an East End Glasgow hood.
Walk a mile in my shoes my friend.
That’s all I’m saying.
Walk that mile.
Talking about the great English essay, I often wonder how that book got on.Remember the one they put together for charity last year? Yeah, how’s that whole thing going? I wonder how they are handling all that fame. Haven’t seen it on any reading lists yet, don’t remember it on the bookshelves down the supermarket. Yeah, wonder how that’s going. Yeah.
There now. That’s that.
We’re all friends again and we’ll say no more about it.
All I’m saying is some of us carry the burden of an altogether more iconic, some would say ridiculous, nominative. Every day some of us have to see it on our credit cards, our passports (I can not return to Corfu) and drivers licences. Try talking to someone when they’re staring at your security tag, reading and re-reading your name, mouthing it silently. The so-called friends who write out your name in full for the amusement of the postman even though you’ve begged them not to.
I mean, I think we’d all agree that I’ve been pretty supportive when Kim bemoans his name; I keep telling him straight that it’s common.
My father says that Gorilla Bananas may be the best essayist since Orwell. Well, could be, but he’s never getting on the South Bank Show with a name redolent of an East End Glasgow hood.
Walk a mile in my shoes my friend.
That’s all I’m saying.
Walk that mile.
Talking about the great English essay, I often wonder how that book got on.Remember the one they put together for charity last year? Yeah, how’s that whole thing going? I wonder how they are handling all that fame. Haven’t seen it on any reading lists yet, don’t remember it on the bookshelves down the supermarket. Yeah, wonder how that’s going. Yeah.
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