I'm doin' it today. Alright?


First and foremost, a brief report on The Project.

I chose three highlighter colours. Saturn green for the good bits, (green for GO), A gay pink for the boring “Dennis Norden” bits, and a bright Jaffa orange for the bits that were plot development.

I had emptied my brain, had Best of Cream on the headphones, and had worked up to page 46.

“…born under a bad sign, I been down ever since I began to walk,…”

Tap on the shoulder.

An attractive slip of a girl was asking what I was doing.
I explained I was marking out the story as we had discussed, using a colour code of my own design.

Are those library books? she asked
I explained they were only the ‘big print’ versions.

It was not me who raised their voice first. That is important.

I pointed out the sign, which required no disruptions, or eating and that I was a ratepayer. She would not be gainsaid.
When I am wealthy, I shall have her sacked.

Another thought to clarify. I am not a writer. I have no pretensions on that score. I intend to write the book by following the formula, but if I’m aiming at the airport, holiday, by the pool market, it will need a couple of sex scenes.
Maybe not. I’ll have to think about that one. Books tend not to have sex scenes in them any more. I wonder if the time is ripe for a return to a bit of raunch?


British Army in huff
Will not set up the Scalectrix or Subutteo.

I am out of sorts today. The freed hostage didn’t thank his rescuers. So fucking what? It’s their fucking jobs, the blood thirsty CARDS.
He’s a Christian. He has bonded with his captors and thinks the army are paid killers. What’s the problem? Does the army now require a thank you letter or they stop your five pound note at Christmas? It takes the joy out it.

‘You’re free!’

‘Hurrah’

‘First thing, you better wash your hands and write that note, AND I want to see it before you post it.’

‘Ohhhh, can’t I do it later?’

‘I won’t tell you again.’

General Jackson, The Irish may remember him as the man in command of the soldiers who killed all the protesters by shooting them, said that the Special Air Service were disappointed to receive no thanks (and were staying in for the week with their Airfix kits.)

FUCK ME GENTLY!

Hey Jackson! Get your soldiers the fuck out of Dodge, and tell them to dry their fucking eyes.

A fat faced dimpled prick of a man was on the t.v. the other night saying what wonderful things our (British) service men and women were doing in Iraq.

Name me three, you fucking piece of shit dogsucker CARD.

Sorry, I said I was out of sorts. Anyway, I also wonder how the factions in the North would have appreciated a Muslim team flying in to Belfast to bring peace and harmony.

Sorry again. Don’t know what’s got into me.

UPDATE: This is he.

Piece of shit dogsucker.